Quack. Quack! QUACK! [ Lots of silly quacking noise, and then some giggles. ]

I'm a llama.

[ Long pause, which is then followed with a heavy, bored sigh. ]

I'm bored. I need a pencil sharpener, too.

Do I have to do homework while I'm here? I'm allergic to homework. I have a doctor's note if you don't believe me.

[ Another pause. ]What kind of ( Read more... )

[ There's a brief silence - pardon Carl while he gets used to the junogam - before any noise cuts through. ]

- Hello?

So, uh. I hate to be a nuisance, but if anyone wouldn't mind sharing what's going on, that'd be great. Well, what's going on, and also how to get out of here.

[ Beat. ]

Assuming that's possible, anyway.

[ Another beat. And then ( Read more... )

This--there's no way--!

[ Please allow her a moment to hyperventilate quietly. This is what happens when you've returned to fairytale lands with an ogre-pulled caravan. ...Okay, time to be strong! ]

I thought this was over, you know? A bad dream I woke up from and not one I'd return to. I mean, sure, there were some fun times here. Mostly bad ( Read more... )

Um.

Hi.

What am I doing here? Was this a planned field trip?

-mutters.- That statue looks like my cat...

As much as I adore cult musicals, and I do, being crazy-glued into a Riff Raff costume is only an inch shy of cruel. Not only are hunchback handymen unglamorous, if I were any more acquainted with my room it and I would be intimate partners ( Read more... )

Uh-- I have a kind of...weird question. Does anyone know anything about, uh-- condoms? Like. You can't use them after you use them for balloons, right?

So...I can take this..."costume" off now? And it won't get all, uh. Tight?

[Somebody got stuck in his Rocky Horror costume...And not the modest one.]

I do not see the point of sharing a room if one never comes in contact with the other. I can only assume that this is a common issue, and one that should be dealt with.

[obnoxious static, rustling, then:]

-what's this do? Oh. Hello? Can people hear me?

[more rustling, then a fwump]

Hi, I'm Kurt Hummel. Does anybody know where I can find some self-raising flour? And eggs. Oh, and icing in every colour. I don't think - [GASP] - is- is that a giant? But those aren't even real.

...I don't have to ride on it, do

Well, at least they've given us the chance to trade for things here. How long has it been since this caravan has stopped in a town that wasn't under a lake? It's a wonder how the food supplies on board don't run out. It's always so fresh, too...

[sigh.] Anyway, Morrigan? I'm ready. Just... tell me where to meet you, all right?